Kailee’s multiple blessings

I consider this lively girl a blessing to the family in general and most especially to me in particular. When her conception was whispered to me more than 6 years ago amidst a cascade of tears, I heaved a sigh relief and silently thanked Jesus for his gift to me. The circumstances by which she came to me didn’t matter at all. What mattered was that I had a granddaughter.

God is good to give me the opportunity to bring her up personally - a blessed chance that not all grandfathers have. God even left me without a paying job for two years so that I could spend all my time with her.

At 6 years old this grade 2 kid is everywhere the family is. Whether it be in some Southeast Asian country or an out-of-town marathon.

Now she will be with us again in a grand vacation halfway around the world.

I would like to imagine Jesus saying to her – “here's your visa kid, have fun!”

“M” in the visa signifies “Multiple” and that means she will be allowed into the US of A as many times as she can within the span of 10 years. Thank you Jesus for Kailee's 'multiple' blessing.

Against all odds

According to the Bureau of Consular Affairs of the United States of America the Adjusted Refusal Rate (B–visas only) by Nationality for the fiscal year 2013 for the Filipinos was 24.1%, the Thais 11.1% and Malaysians 5%.

Based on the above-mentioned facts anyone can see that it is more difficult for a Filipino to acquire a B-visa (tourist visa) compared to a Malaysian or a Thai. On top of that is common knowledge among Filipinos that acquiring a visa is expensive, intimidating and frustrating and a refusal is almost sure for one who belongs to the middle-class, a fresh graduate, a nurse and a single mom and toddler daughter and a whole family applying together.

At the planning stage of our attempt on this visa project we fairly well knew how low the chances for us were. JP and Kukie were both nurses less than a decade into their professions and both were single. Kailee was 6 years old and she would be applying for the visa without a father and Nok was a single employee with no document to prove that she would come back to Thailand. It was also very clear that we had the intention of traveling together as a family.

Jo ann and I were not concerned very much about our own visas since we had been to America already, but it was not right that it would be just her and me on this planned trip.

You can imagine the preparations that went into the gathering of documents, which some of our friends recommended after going through the same process. We did the online application, had photos taken, secured the bank statements, photocopied the passports and work permits, acquired the letters of certification from our employer and then we were ready.

Ready in the sense that our papers were all inside a clear envelope, but our minds couldn’t stop dwelling on the possibility of a rejection. In other words we were stressed to the last neuron of our brains. Sleep on the night before our scheduled interview did not come for some of us.

We were up early on the day of the interview and we made sure that the travel time from the house to the embassy had the notorious Bangkok traffic covered. Entry into the US Embassy compound was a breeze through very tough security. A clerk arranged all our papers and another took the necessary biometry and made sure that our papers exactly matched our physical identities. We were given our queue number and finally the family of Philip Eleazer J. Moreno entered the ‘most holy place’ for visa interviews.

For the actual interview we were broken up into four. Kukie and Kailee at one window, JP at another, Nok at still another and Jo Ann and myself in a separate interview. The questions for me were simple: what is your name, what is your work and why are you going to America? For Jo Ann it was: how long have you been working at Yanhee and what is your work? Our supporting documents – bank statements, employer’s certification, etc were not asked, which means that the only documents that the consult required was our appointment confirmation, photo and passport.

JP and Nok had the same ease in going through the interview, but Kukie had to answer questions related to Kailee’s father and the legality of Kailee traveling with her. She took the longest to get done and while at it Jo Ann and I were already outside silently praying for her deliverance.

This family was such a sight when we finally got together outside the interview area. We were joyously hugging each other and Kukie was actually in tears. I could see the other applicants who were lining up to process their papers staring at us and I could imagine that they were wishing that they too would end up with the same jubilant results.

The most profound realization that entered our minds after this experience was the fact that we got our visas just like we were buying something off the counter at the mall (sans the emotions) and we did it against all odds.

We know that God had a direct hand in this visa project and we give Him all the praise and the glory.

that's us celebrating after the successful interview.

Missionary or Mercenary

These two words start with the letter M and end with the syllables “nary.” They may look identical and both may connote expatriates in another country, but in essence they stand in stark contrast against each other.

Let me clarify the meaning of each word before I proceed. A missionary is someone who goes forth in the name of Jesus to fulfill the gospel commission. A mercenary on the other hand risks his life and limb in another country for the main purpose of personal gain.

The life of a missionary has uncertainties related to sustenance and the outcome of the mission. Support for his efforts is propped up by the pledges of the sending institution and his ability to ply his trade or expertise in support for his mission. Paul – God’s first and foremost missionary to the non-Jew world supported his mission by building and repairing tents. He was a lofty Pharisee before his conversion, but he dumped his classy robes for the lowly tailor garb just so he could support himself in preaching the gospel. He was also supported by the converts who believed in this commission.

Most often the missionary embarks on his journey with only faith to hold on to. There is no contract as to how much he will receive and the benefits that he will reap while at the job and after it. The missionary has to keep his pledged supporters with updates on his work and sometimes remind them of their pledges or he would go hungry.

Contrary to the missionary, the mercenary is protected by a contract, which stipulates the amount of money he will receive and the benefits that he will get during and after his tenure. Faith is not a component in his job, because the contract clearly states the money matters. The mercenary knows that his contractor is rich enough and regular enough to keep him supplied and contented or he won’t sign the contract in the first place.

In some cases the dividing line between the missionary and mercenary is blurred when it comes to religious activities by certain groups who lay claim to the “missionary” title. They assert that they are true missionaries who go out in the name of Jesus. They go about preaching, teaching and doing medical work with the label “missionary” and some honestly believe that indeed they are missionaries, but are they really true to the calling of the gospel or are they conveniently there to make money like a mercenary?

So how do we separate true missionary from the bogus one and what can be the gauge to distinguish one from the other? Easy! Just compare the lifestyle and standard of living of both groups and you will note that the mercenary is busy acquiring land, cars and houses while on the job. His kids can get the most expensive education there is and when he retires he’ll be sure of healthcare and sustenance. While on the job, the mercenary’s bank account is growing and he has the assurance that at the end of his term he can live an easy life.

The missionary on the other hand is no richer nor well off than when he started his mission. Most often he doesn’t come back to his own country, but keeps on his mission until he dies. A retirement home is not one that he built with financial gains from being a missionary – because there actually is no financial gain. He considers the missionary journey as his temporary abode and heaven his only true and permanent home.

a coming together...

... is just another way of describing what reunion is all about.

the month of february 2014 is special for me because I had the chance to hug the guys who mean so much to me. This was possible when I flew home to the Philippines for the primary reason of attending the first ever reunion of my class in medical school.

meeting the other guys outside of the class was the icing on the already delicious cake.

having breakfast with the best friends that medical school ever made. these guys are accomplished marathoners from new york to beijing to singapore and of course the philippines. they took me under their roof for a night. thanks bffs!!

a prodigal son come home... sort of, coz it has been a long time that I last kissed the mother of my wife. mong and chino's presence added to the blessedness of this reunion.

aha... so these two are together again? yeah... that's Erberto Arriaga - my buddy in high school who I consider my twin brother, teacher and partner in crime, etc. etc. Thanks bay and Mary for making my stay in the Philippines very memorable... and busog.

at cuzzin Inday Luz's (lady with a pillow) place in Guihing for dinner. the patatim was extra delicious.

that's the baby sister of my dad - auntie Sally. She's one of the two surviving siblings of dad and at 72 years she's as healthy as only a vegetarian can be. the last time i saw her was something like 8 years ago.

talk about favorites. I have long considered these guys as my favorite cousins in spite of the strong objection from different quarters of our clan (that claim is still subject to litigation). Toots (center) is a very successful real estate manager. just give her a few minutes and she'll convince you to buy a chunk of the philippines.

Auntie Oming - and I say that name with reverence and respect. she's mom's younger sister - the only aunt who understood by wayward ways and didn't pass judgment on me. she also set an example of wit and wisdom that i adore her for. at the age of 86 she has moved into the house of alzheimer and can only remember faces that are beautiful - a category that i failed to come up to. at this meeting she was just a week post-op for a hip replacement surgery and she was coping very well. our noses, cheeks, eyes, lips and chins will prove the irrefutable DNA connection.

 Bonch - auntie Oming's youngest baby and my most favored cousin and brother in Jesus. we've spent many years together as kids because he used to live with us in mindanao. I always wished that he was my true brother.

 who would ever imagine that fate would let this two guys meet? Bangkok was blessed to witness the bonding that Edmund and I went through in the many coffee shops, ice cream parlors, japanese restos, day trips to hua hin, river kwai, etc. as we attempted to resolve the questions of life in relation to the gospel and Jesus' love for us. it's only been about 6 years since we were introduced to each other, but it seems that we've been friends forever. Thanks Mon for the lunch and bonding moments during my short stop-over in Manila.

fraternity life didn't stop when i exited from medical school. I am honored for these guys to host a party while i was there and we had a good time reminiscing and planning. i was also introduced to the younger generation and i am awed by their zeal and energy in upholding the ideals of this brotherhood. thanks freres and soeurs for your time and effort in this event.

Bing, Tes and Anatole - the guys who made medical school enjoyable and memorable. they are now super successful consultants at the Davao Doctors Hospital and they didn't allow me to leave without having lunch with them. Thanks guys for always counting me as your treasured friend and I consider myself so blessed to be.

hahaha... reunited with the perfect combination of duckembryo+durian+carlorossisangria. what else can this bloke ask for? 

thank you Jesus for friends and family in my life!

class reunions can be challenging?

not if the reunion is done about 5 years from graduation or the participants remain within the same province or country and if they are still young and they are active netizens.

consider a class reunion 31 years from graduation. the participants are in their late fifties, most are not active netizens and some are suffering from some old-age illness.

you would expect that some would not be able to attend because their doctor wouldn't allow them, they are not strong enough to withstand intercontinental travel or they cannot be contacted because they refuse to blend into the world of Info Tech.

the greatest challenge, however, in the reunion of the demographic sample described above was... putting a name to this face:

there was nothing wrong with this guy's face and attitude. he was still the wacky and witty guy that I parted ways with some 30 years ago. the challenge was actually in the ability to remember his name, and more than half the attendees had to dig deep into their gray matter, but couldn't find anything there to help them remember him.

Nellie failed and in spite of our coaxing had to admit that the face of the guy had no resemblance to a classmate in medical school.

Hans too couldn't put a name to the handsome face.

Bing couldn't hide her shock and disbelief when finally she was told who the guy is.

Rey was cool and tried to appear brilliant, but obviously some portions of his memory had fallen asleep and needed rousing.

not even a hand in his hand and his arm on Evelyn's shoulder could bring back memories of yesterday.

Nellie in denial while pointing an accusing finger at the guy. C'mon Nel, you can't blame him for your failing memory.

to celebrate the awakening of our brain cells and the restoration of our memories we had to pose for this picture with Jun Salud. Next time we have a reunion I will stare at this photo every day for a month to make sure that when we meet I wouldn't be diagnosed with Alzhiemer's. 

Thanks Jerome for the photos!

DMSF ’83 reunion

The wait took thirty-one long summers

And hours of dialing up the numbers

Nights working up the computer keys

In a bid to bring together friends I miss

Reminiscing:

White spotless uniforms well pressed

Stinking cadavers lying undressed

Exhausted minds trying hard to learn

Equations on why gastric acid burns

Four grueling years of hard learning

Like glue it seals tight friends bonding

Each took off to find a place in the sun

But the ties kept strong in the long run

Realizing:

All the years of chasing our careers

Building a family with blood, sweat and tears

Saving up some money in the banks

But more often than that we just got thanks

Back to where this friendship all started

You guys still look like we never parted

It was so nice to hug you one more time

Before we finally fall from our prime.

31 years we’re now an endangered species

Balder, grayer, smitten with old age diseases

The memories of the years we had together

Alzheimer’s won’t take away is my prayer.