Kailee's most recent thoughts - November 30, 2022

Hi loloooo

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Kailee

I know this is really sudden but I just wanted to show you this!

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Kailee

Hey! Been a hot minute since I last wrote a blog, a testimony of sorts, but I wanted to do it again. Here am I, writing my thoughts down once more. I’ve been looking at really old gems of writing that I had done in the past years–the grammar is all messed up–but they still strike chords within me. I got inspired and I miss that kind of writing–the kind where you pour your heart out on some stray topic you just so happen to think about. What happened to pass my crowded mind was a recent event called the Regional Student Convention, RSC for short. RSC is a foreign topic to those outside of my current curriculum, so basically it is an annual competition of schools from any country in a specific region. It has a lot of categories to participate in, such as Music, Platform, Academics, etc. It has quite a lot of pros but also a lot of cons, and usually this event stirs up within me a mixed bag of emotions every year. I have participated in this RSC for three times now, and my experience with each one always goes like this: absolute pain and misery in the months leading up to RSC, and then RSC itself being an amazing, soul-restoring event. It’s quite a crazy process, but I want to talk about this year’s RSC, and just my general experience in this one. The pandemic had canceled RSC for two years straight, so hearing the return of RSC was at first a great thing. Yay, we get to do cool stuff again, or something. In this RSC though, I strived to do something different. In the past, I always participated only for the medals and the glory that came with this event. But no, this time, I decided I do it for the Lord, and not really for awards this time. Unfortunately I have a tendency to procrastinate and to make excuses, so I didn’t really act upon that desire. Instead, I just relaxed and did nothing until the two months before RSC. Then my parents started to push me to begin something, anything, and I finally started to do my tasks. I distinctly remember the three or two weeks before RSC, as everything was being worked on, fixed, and polished. The grind was insane, and despite all of my friends refusing to do so, I added the extra burden of homework to myself, so it was a tiring and stressful season. But every day of drawing, editing, writing, even exercising, I kept reminding myself that I purposed this for the Lord, and no matter what happened, all I wanted was to finish my events and maybe bring glory to God through my events. I had long lost any hope of awards, because this was senior year, and there were bound to be people so much better than me, right? RSC finally came. Let me tell you: the grind beforehand always discourages you, and once, I even wanted to quit. But the fun events and small moments were worth everything. It really restored some of my sanity and a bit of joy. In RSC, I made friends. Each event I participated in, I put my best and my prayers into it, and I actually enjoyed each one. I remember laughing at 10 in the night, joking around with my friends as we vainly tried to sleep. I remember making many mistakes, repenting, and being forgiven. I remember all the exhibits I’ve seen, all the beautiful drawings and the awkward performances. Oh, the awards? They were bountiful. Not just in medals. Finding myself now, a week after RSC, back in school and doing homework. I can tell you: this RSC was one of the best I have ever had. I think what made this year different from the other years was simply because I had committed everything to God, no matter the outcome. It changed everything, and it changed me. I’m so glad I gave it to God, because without Him, all that stress would have been quite useless. I don’t know if I will participate in the next one; it’s chancy at best, but I have learned many important lessons. The best lesson I have learned, though, is committing my ways unto the Lord, and trusting in Him. He certainly directed my paths.

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Kailee

I looked back at my old "blogs" and wanted to do so again

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